Doctor Visits

The past week has been one of the hardest I can remember. It all started last Friday when I had my annual appointment at the doctor's office. I went to see my new doctor to get checked for moles, and to have my annual pap done. I had to changed doctors because I am now on Joe's insurance, and my doctor wasn't a part of his network. I loved this new doctor. She was very tedious and check everything that I had questions about and more. She offered solutions to a problem that I have had in my throat since April, and left no stone unturned. Everything was going well, she did the pap and then the last procedure was the pelvic exam and I would be free to go.

Have you ever seen someone's face go from having a non expression to a face that is expressing concern? Well I have now experienced it and I can tell you it is one of the scariest things I have seen. Durring the pelvic exam, I felt so vulnerable and anxious. She kept asking me questions, and immediately I knew something was wrong. After the exam, she told me that she felt something that "wasn't right." She was pretty easy on me after all I had just got through telling her what a paranoid person that I can be. She referred me to the imaging center so that they could do a sonogram to figure out what it was that she felt in my uterus. She called it a mass. A mass could be anything. I really don't like that word, and increasingly hated it all week. I also had to give some blood for all of the tests that she ordered.

So this left me with my thoughts until the sonogram on Tuesday. I actually had two different sonograms, and external and an internal. The technician couldn't really tell me anything, but she did confirm a mass, a rather large mass in my uterus. The mass is 3 inches long and looks even bigger on the screen she was looking at. I didn't really like the looks of it. After she was finished it was more waiting for the radiologist and my doctor to look at the pictures and get back to me.

Thursday afternoon, the doctor called and told me that I have a "large non-canerous fibroid tumor." So, it isn't cancer, but I have to be referred to another doctor for treatment. I am anemic and have to take iron pills for that, but that is minor. There is another twist to the story, during both ultrasounds, they were unable to see my left ovary and they think I might have been born without one. I have to do a CT scan on Wednesday to find out more about this. All the research I have done says that if I was born with only one ovary, it really doesn't matter much. I just have half as many eggs as a normal person. (still enough I hope)

I am writing about this, because I have been very ignorant about women's health issues. I haven't ever heard of fibroids, and they can occur in one in five women. I expected that as I grew older I might have some problems, as my mother did, but I did not expect them to arrive when I was 27. I am going to be okay. I am freaked out, and will never miss an appointment with my doctor again, but I am going to get the problem treated.

Joe and I are dealing with the what if's right now. It will probably be harder for us to conceive than the normal couple, but we know that there are options out there for us. My hope in sharing this experience is that all of you women out there who haven't gone to your doctor in a while, go. My problems would have only gotten worse with time. I think women should talk about their experiences more often. I felt so alone when I first found out about this, but so many other women have shared with me their experiences and I feel better. We need to stick together.

With love Always,
Kat